I'm particularly curious by those who believe that there is a right way to celebrate the holidays, and any other way makes them sad or angry - for me, any holiday is about finding or even creating new traditions that give us happiness. Connecting with meaning that helps and supports our lives; or simply gives us pleasure - a time to enjoy. I think that the reason some folks have a hard time with holidays, including depression and worse, stems from those expectations that are forced onto them. That they must behave or believe in ways that just don't ring true to them. When we can let expectations go, and look within for that light of truth, we can enjoy any time for what it is.
My Christmas tree is up and filled with white lights - symbolizing so many things to me. Childhood memories, wonderful family times, the sparkling eyes of my son as he enjoys his presents, the beauty of nature, the winter celebration of solstice, the birth of Jesus, the tree that the Buddha sat under to awaken, the death of my father and my daughter Holly, the season of winter and it's stillness, snowflakes and ice crystals each unique yet so lovely in their impermenence - all of these things are wrapped up in this holiday.
Tonight is my personal and private holiday, though - it's the night that I'm found sitting in the dark; only the tree lights twinkling, wrapped up in a comforter sipping hot chocolate, squinting my eyes at the tree to see the little lights soften in a glow around the tree - sitting quietly, meditating on all of the meanings of this night. Shedding a few tears in happiness and sadness, breathing in peace, feeling my connection and place in my personal history, the season, the history of the world, in the universe....
the quiet fall of snow is the perfect image for this feeling.
