You dwell in peace, freedom, and safety.
The one who offends another after being offended by him
Harms himself and harms the other.
When you feel hurt but do not hurt the other
You are truly victorious.
You practice and your victory benefits both of you.
When you understand the roots of anger in yourself and in another,
Your mind will enjoy true peace, joy and lightness.
You become the doctor who heals himself and heals the other.
If you don't understand,
You will think not getting angry to be the act of a fool."
~ the Buddha, from Thich Nhat Hanh's Teachings on Love
I need this teaching so much, yet I resist healing my anger - I've teased that I would be enlightened already if I didn't have to drive on city streets! Even though folks that know me compliment me on being patient and loving, I know that I have a long way to go. I still have those hot buttons - injustice and arrogance and thoughtlessness just drive me crazy. Then I mutter and murmer my dissatisfaction, or frown at the inconsiderate or unsafe driver (I love George Carlin's comment "anyone driving slower than me is an idiot, anyone driving faster is a maniac" - I laugh so hard at that one, because it rings so true; it's how I feel, even though I recognize how nutty I am for feeling that way!).
Tonglen is a wonderful practice for this - especially taking Pema Chodron's advice that compassion needs to come from genuine recognition with the one who you feel has wounded you, not the condescending pity for those who are oh so confused and lost. This is a layer in the onion that I recognize as a hurdle that I need to do the work on. (makes me wish there was some kind of Buddhist tooth fairy that would just bop me on the head with a magic wand to fix me up - lol! ;)
