My son just left to go visit friends and work on getting a band together. It's so amazing to watch him grow up - he's getting so tall and independent with so many interests. He's such a good kid - we had a talk awhile back about rebelliousness, since that's such a typical thing to happen in teenagers. We decided that it really doesn't have to be that way though - especially if he has enough room to explore who he is and who he wants to become.

We talked about what reasonable boundaries are (which I'm convinced kids of any age need to help them feel safe), and what areas he needs for me to be more free with. We've done pretty well with it, actually. He's grown his hair long (he has gorgeous hair, too - I'm jealous! ;) which I only nag him a bit about for brushing it. And he has friends over often - while I preferr peace and quiet, it's better, I think, to have the friends over here so I can keep a discreet eye on them.

So far, so good - we rarely war over chores (even though I probably should be more strict about that - I'm scared he'll grow up lazy), we never fight about his appearance (I simply want him to be clean!), and when I do get on his back or holler at him, we talk about it afterward - if I'm wrong, I apologize - or if I hollered inappropriately, even if the subject of the hollering was right, I apologize for hollering and we talk about why I was upset, and why it's important to do certain things.

He's good about admitting when he's been a pain-in-the-neck as well - even though he's a lot like me, in wanting to have the last word in things!

Most important, I think, is telling him that I love him everyday - not for anything he does, but for who he is.